KelownaNow meets 'America's Worst Mom'

| January 19, 2017 in Kelowna

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In many ways, with the advancement of modern technology and parenting knowledge, there has never been a safer time to raise children.

Yet modern parents are often overcome with fear. Fear of society, fear of vaccinations, GMO’s, toys and playgrounds.

Lenore Skenazy, a reporter and mother of two from New York, challenges this concept of parenting in fear and has certainly received some public backlash. After publishing an article in the New York Sun about letting her children ride the New York subway unsupervised she was dubbed “America’s Worst Mom.”

Skenazy has written a book called “Free Range Kids” and tours her presentation on giving children freedom without going nuts with worry.  A presentation that will be visiting Kelowna’s Rotary Centre for the Arts on January 23rd.

Skenazy claims that many of modern parenting fears are influenced by media, technology and a reaction to the absolute freedom today’s parents had as children. She argues that when children are given  some independence, it allows them to live the childhood that was natural to children just a few generations ago and that everyone benefits from parents to kids and society.

"We’re taught to worry about our kids in absolutely every situation," said Skenazy in an interview with KelownaNow.

“Fear that they're not eating organic, or drinking out of a glass baby bottle or they got into the lower level class in school and now they will never succeed."

It’s not Skenazy’s intention to undermine these fears, but she wants to offer the argument that fear should not be the deciding factor in all parenting decisions.

"You can always find something to worry about, but what’s weird about our culture is that we look high and low for the one example of the time something turned out wrong and we use it to determine how we go forth and what we let our children do," argued Skenazy.

It’s this idea that if a kid hurt themselves on the monkey bars, all of a sudden playgrounds no longer have monkey bars.

"Everything keeps being declared as not safe enough, as if there’s absolute safety to be achieved and as if 99.9% safety is the equivalent of dangerous."

According to Skenazy this growing culture of helicopter parenting is in many ways depriving children of developing skills that become very useful later in life.

“It’s this conundrum of I want to raise a problem solver but I keep solving all his problems," said Skenazy.

Her presentation engages the audience in this conversation but the goal of the talk is not to throw blame at modern parents. As a mother herself, Skenazy understands the struggle to find the proper balance of freedom and safety for children.

"I don’t blame parents for being nervous or helicoptering," said Skenazy.

“"It's a great world but a horrible stream of news on television, in many ways parents act almost reasonably in light of the media they are faced with on a daily basis"

Without a doubt, media and technology have a much larger influence on parenting than it did even a decade ago.

"No one is going to buy a product to protect their child if they believe there is nothing to worry about,” argued Skanezy.

“So the technology that’s telling you it will provide peace of mind, first has to make sure you are terrified."

The influence of technology and media on parenting are some of the topics that will be covered in what promises to be an insightful and entertaining presentation by Skenazy at the Rotary Centre for the Arts on Monday, January 23rd. The event is free but requires online registration, which you can complete by clicking right here.

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